Life is still struggling along, and I have continued to eat a lot of crap I shouldn't since my last confession. I was doing well for a whole day, until 7pm when I ate half the pantry. Not much worth eating in there now... so I went and bought crap to eat last night. Seriously, do I own a brain???
On to the positives though - I think I'm learning. I did buy (and eat) some stuff last night that was inadvisable at best, insane at worst. But I also stocked up on lots of other stuff that WILL be OK to eat, and hopefully I'll manage not to eat it all at once. I have this ongoing battle of being aware of my own eating frailties, while also being... well, a tight ass. If I don't have food (particularly snack food) pre packaged into individual serves, I am severely predisposed to eating the whole freaking lot. But pre packaged serves cost a lot more. Well, too bad budget - I'm buying the single serves. I can't be trusted to dish up my own serves at the moment.
So last night I bought small serve yoghurts (100g tubs). And muesli bars. And mini boxes of fruit/nut. And mini boxes of sultanas. I also bought some convenience food, which I have a major aversion to, but I'm looking for that moderation switch. I'm not going back to eating lean cuisines and whatever other crap frozen meals I used to inhale, that shit is toxic. But a box of pancake mix, some protein powder with artificial ingredients - this kind of stuff probably isn't going to kill me if used in moderation. It's all about trying something new, because clearly what I've been doing hasn't been the answer.
My second big realisation this week, which is something I have always known but just struggle to put into practice, is that I need a plan to work to. This will work with food too, and I should get myself sorted this weekend for that, but I'm actually referring to the exercise at this point. If I have a plan, or a schedule, or whatever, to work too, I'm pretty good at sticking to it. If I leave it to "whatever I feel like at the time", you can bet your ass I feel like sitting on the couch and eating crap. I had my evening bootcamps last month, and I went to them all (except when they were cancelled for excessive heat). That's over now, and I'm entering a phase of solo training, which could be a danger period. But I think I'm going to be OK, because I have my HM training schedule in place. I didn't feel like getting up and running this morning, but I did it because the schedule said I had to. I'll chalk that up as a win, and hope that it continues!
So far the HM training has been pretty mild (but we are only 3 days in of course!) Monday was 3.5km in the morning, and cross training (step class at the gym) at night. Tuesday was a cross training day - cycling to and from work, about 31km all up. Today is a 3.5km run, and then the night off. Tomorrow is supposed to be a 4km run in the morning (which I'll do), but the strength session at night won't be happening as I'm booked in for a massage - aah bliss. Friday is scheduled as a rest day, so I have to work out whether I add the strength session there, or just let it go for this week. I will report back in due course :-)